ABOUT THE FOUNDER'S VISION
Ellie Collin
​​Why don’t they teach us how to be good at relationships in school? After school, I could tell you about my pet dog in French but had no idea how to effectively tell my dog not to walk all over me, let alone my boss/partner/family....
Why didn’t I learn this 20 years ago? I could do long division but couldn’t hold down a long-term relationship.
Why didn't school prepare me fully for the workplace? I read languages at Oxford but my ability to read people was useless…
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WHY AREN’T WE TAUGHT THIS IN SCHOOLS?
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Yep, I've heard these plaintive, frustrated questions, and others like them, countless times. Haven't you?
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The fact is, relationships can be hard because people can be complicated. Assumptions, misunderstandings and years of conditioning get in the way of understanding and connection. But not everyone finds it so difficult; and not everyone is difficult to be around. More often than not these people have been loved and nurtured and enjoyed positive modelling in their childhoods. Or they've worked hard to learn how as adults. I have worked with people, mainly teenagers, all my adult life and it always seemed bonkers that such a vital facet of our lives, one that really can mean the difference between life and death, is left to chance - whether we were born into, and travelled through, a world that teaches us how to get the best out of ourselves and others.
And things seem to be harder than ever in that respect; in fact, who am I kidding, the cat is firmly out of the bag: covid (and more general) isolation & loneliness, social media, social division, the ‘war on woke’, #everyonesinvited, the ongoing mental health crisis, ‘the manosphere’ etc etc, have all taken their toll on our ability to communicate, empathise and be good eggs. As a pastoral lead at some of the top schools in the world, I was endlessly amazed at how bright and brilliant people can be and at the same time how self-serving, unempathetic and even cruel. And so we are all suffering, as is the natural world, as we strive to make it through as individuals rather than a collective. I want to level the playing field and give everyone a fighting chance to flourish in a world very full of people. I want to equip people with the skillsets and mindsets needed to do this now and in the future.​
How am I equipped to do this?
Well, first and foremost I am an educator. I have always taught, primarily English, with all its stories and insights and empathy and communication skills, but also through years of pastoral work, finding ways for students to understand and regulate themselves and to engage positively with others and the world around them. Mindfulness courses, positive psychology conferences, Make a Difference Days, Global Issue groups, Pride societies, Diversity clubs.
I didn’t just teach my subject, I taught how to live well.
And many of these lessons had been hard learned in my own life. I didn’t have an easy road through my childhood and the knock on was substantial flailing. It wasn’t until my 30s that I really started to work out what was happening - thank you therapy and many self-help books and podcasts - and what to do about it. Martin Seligman and the Positive Psychology movement showed me a positive path, The School of Life a pragmatic one, Terrance Real a relational one, and many many more amazing voices that I absorbed and utilised to feel calm and in control, something I could then model every day for my students and with all my relationships. Obviously I've still not nailed this - I am a constant work in progress, as we all are, and that's the point. It's all about growth, sometimes sideways, and even backwards, but gradually forward.
My MA in Gender, Society and Representation from UCL allowed me the space to delve even deeper into the ways in which we are conditioned by our environments (I particularly focused on masculinity as so few people seemed to be talking about this, which seemed mad) and my certified life coaching gave me tangible tools with which to unpick how conditioning impacts on our ability to enjoy good relationships of all types and my certified emotional intelligence qualification gave me the skills to do things better. I do not claim to understand the intricacies of other people's experiences, especially not that of young people growing up today, but coaching has enabled me to ask the right questions to get as close to understanding as I can, and to teach others to do the same. ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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I am constantly curious about what people have to say about the art (and difficulties) of relationships. I have read/listened/watched/discussed/studied/experienced A LOT. All of this is woven into my talks, workshops, resources and consultancy. Alongside me, my content is constantly gaining maturity and insight, as is the way I tailor and deliver it effectively. All my years as a teacher position me perfectly for understanding schools and the people within them. By engaging individuals at every level of an organisation and shifting collective cultures and mindsets, people will thrive, no matter who they are and where they are, and work will become more creative, collaborative and productive.
I hope that, through this organisation, I can make sure everyone is better equipped for relationships: the strength of these are fundamental to the flourishing of any society and its ability to live sustainably within the natural world.